Mann, today God has really been teaching me the value of patience and trust in him!!! Sometimes I really want to have control of a situation and I realize that it means it's because I have a lack of trust in God!
Recently, I've discovered that I am a relatively emotional individual!... growing up with a fairly emotional family and having emotional close friends, made me seem not too caring about things.. or just more laid back and stuff.. but i realized, that when something I really really care about is out of my control, that is when I get emotional! Recently a friend rebuked me! She was telling me how that just shows that I lack faith in God! When I first heard that from her, I was confused... I was like (in my head) "Faith is one of my strengths!" at least when it comes to just surrendering things to God! But after i sat down and thought about it more, my pride broke down and I realized how truly correct she was! I realized that those things I care about the MOST, I should leave in God's hands and surrender!! What is the point of worrying about them?! Nothing that I do will fix or make things better! Everything is in God's control! I realized the smaller things I had "faith" in wasn't really faith! If I don't care a lot about it in the first place, giving/surrendering it to God isn't a big deal!.. it's not even faith!... its apathy! In the same way how sacrifice isn't sacrifice unless it's something valuable! or how lost isn't lost unless it's valuable! I hope that makes sense!
so yah, I've really been learning to give up the thigns I value in my life to God... this doesn't mean I don't care about it, but rather, knowing fully that God is working and everything is under His control. Everything I have is His and the Lord gives and He takes away!
Here's an excerpt from "My utmost for His highest" that really spoke to me
"We are living in a time of tremendous enterprises, a time when we are
trying to work for God, and that is where the trap is. Profoundly
speaking, we can never work for God. Jesus, as the Master Builder, takes
us over so that He may direct and control us completely for His enterprises and His building plans; and no one has any right to demand where he will be put to work."
- Oswald Chambers
Prayer: That I would surrender to God the things in my life that I value, that i may know him! That I would not be like the rich man in Luke 18:18-29, but be willing to surrender my life to God for the sake of knowing Him and following Him.
To value the small things! and not just have "faith" because I don't care. Learning to have faith in the small things as well
Smile :)
Jireh!
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