So I just realized that I really like controlling things!! :/ it's really weird!! haha honestly, I thought of myself of more of a chills kind of guy, but honestly, though I'm chills, I like to at least feel like i have some sort of control of situations in general! it's weird!

For example...when I meet someone new who doesn't know about the gospel and I share it with them, I friggin want their contact!!! so i can follow up!! which isn't bad, but at the same time, isn't necessary! When my friend is struggling in their faith, I want to be the one helping them out of it! for some reason, I feel like...uneasy in placing faith in other people...even though we may have the same goals and things!  What i quickly realized this past week was that my problem is lack of faith in God.  I know i am not meant to reach out to every single one of my facebook friends at a personal level and care for them so obviously, in the end, I can only really focus on a few! and those few can focus on their few and so on and so on!  And i have to realize that if God wants to save someone/bring them closer to Him or just in general..if God wants something to happen, it will happen whether I do something or not!  I need to just focus on what God has placed in my life and go all out in those ministries and have faith that God will take care of the rest!  (okay, to be clear here, this is not an excuse to do nothing...I only think these things because I want to do too much/have a heart for things that God hasn't necessarily opened the doors for me yet...if you knwo what I mean)

In the end, I really liked last weeks sermon on the vine and the branches.  The thing that stuck out to me the most (related to this topic) was that we are branches and our purpose is to bear Christ's fruit! and we shouldn't be worried about how effective or how tasty the fruit is, but just worry about bearing the fruit and having faith in the Vine, Jesus, that the fruit will be effective!  and yah! this was encouraging to me! because I sometimes find myself caught in a thing where I think so much about the effectiveness of something that I don't bear it anymore...and that's the wrong mindset because God has His own plans and knows exactly whats happening and knows what is most effective even though we don't!

Faith...is just one of those interesting things that you can't learn enough about!
sry if everything was mumble jumbled up here! LOL haven't blogged in a while so my mind is like spaghetti atm! LOL