I've realized that maybe one reason why I don't desire God so much is because I don't treasure Him enough!! He is not number 1 in my life!! He is not the thing I desire most!!! And because of that, God has been showing me idols in my life which I didn't really realize were idols! Some things were obvious, others...not so much! Or they were things I've dealt with before and for some reason thought I could deal with them onto own!!! But I can't! I need God to help me deal with these things! I need him to work on my heart and to humble me daily!!! That I can see things through His eyes and not my own!!!
Prayer:
That I may treasure God!!! And really find more than enough satisfaction and joy in Him! That God would continue showing me idols in my life and just tearing them apart...especially the ones I don't want to tear away!! I pray that He will just do it if it will brings closer to Him!!
Smile :)
Jireh!!
Wednesday, May 7, 2014
Monday, May 5, 2014
GRM: Day 1
GRF = God's refining me! been seeing these... 100 happy days! i decided to do this instead haah 100 days of God refining me days! Essentially just posting what God has been teaching me during the day/week/whatever every day! no matter how short or long, no matter how many verses are in it!... Just want to post these and see God work in and through me! :)
Theme verse:
1 Peter 1:6-9
"In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, 9 obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls."
Sometimes I realize that I don't trust God enough! It's funny when you ask God to give you faith, He makes you realize that you just don't have enough faith in areas where you thought you had faith! I really need to listen to myself sometimes! and learn to have faith! and just peace in all situations! Sometimes there are things I REALLY want to have control of...like I get discouraged if I know I have no control in those areas in my life! It's weird for me cos I don't feel this way with many things, so when it happens, I sometimes mistake the feeling for something else! When things are small/don't affect me too much, I find it easy to sacrifice and give it up to God! But honestly, is that really a sacrifice?
I once heard somewhere that sacrifice is ALWAYS something you don't want to give up! It's ALWAYS something you never want to sacrifice! If you are apathetic and don't care about losing it, you are not really sacrificing it! It's sacrifice when something has value to you, and you cherish it, YET you are willing to give it up! And this is something I've been learning like crazy recently! I've been through so many emotional ups and downs these past 5 months, it's sort of ridiculous!...but all for a purpose! I know God is refining me! Even if I'm not getting everything He wants me to get atm, I know He is sovereign and has His plan! i pray that in the meantime, that I would learn to love Him and His word!
Anyways, it's just cool how related trusting God and sacrifice is!
Praying that I would be able to continue trusting God in the small things and would be able to trust God in big things in my life! That I would surrender these idols to Him and love Him more...and just let Him take care of things! :)
Prayer: That God would give me more passion and love for Him alone! To really trust God more than myself! to have a heart change and that I would see things through His eyes! That I would love what He loves and have my heart break for things that break His heart!
Smile!! :)
Jireh!
Theme verse:
1 Peter 1:6-9
"In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, 9 obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls."
Sometimes I realize that I don't trust God enough! It's funny when you ask God to give you faith, He makes you realize that you just don't have enough faith in areas where you thought you had faith! I really need to listen to myself sometimes! and learn to have faith! and just peace in all situations! Sometimes there are things I REALLY want to have control of...like I get discouraged if I know I have no control in those areas in my life! It's weird for me cos I don't feel this way with many things, so when it happens, I sometimes mistake the feeling for something else! When things are small/don't affect me too much, I find it easy to sacrifice and give it up to God! But honestly, is that really a sacrifice?
I once heard somewhere that sacrifice is ALWAYS something you don't want to give up! It's ALWAYS something you never want to sacrifice! If you are apathetic and don't care about losing it, you are not really sacrificing it! It's sacrifice when something has value to you, and you cherish it, YET you are willing to give it up! And this is something I've been learning like crazy recently! I've been through so many emotional ups and downs these past 5 months, it's sort of ridiculous!...but all for a purpose! I know God is refining me! Even if I'm not getting everything He wants me to get atm, I know He is sovereign and has His plan! i pray that in the meantime, that I would learn to love Him and His word!
Anyways, it's just cool how related trusting God and sacrifice is!
Praying that I would be able to continue trusting God in the small things and would be able to trust God in big things in my life! That I would surrender these idols to Him and love Him more...and just let Him take care of things! :)
Prayer: That God would give me more passion and love for Him alone! To really trust God more than myself! to have a heart change and that I would see things through His eyes! That I would love what He loves and have my heart break for things that break His heart!
Smile!! :)
Jireh!
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
wow! my small group leader just had a baby today!!!
iuno why, it's just so amazing seeing new life!!! God is truly amazing!! *sigh* I'm thankful cos seeing these things sort of give me a desire to work harder in school!! I desire a family!...a wife and kids! I don't know when that will happen, but i'm excited to see how God will work through everything!! Can't wait to look back and see how God writes my love story! :) I just know it's going to be so beautiful!
Jireh! :)
iuno why, it's just so amazing seeing new life!!! God is truly amazing!! *sigh* I'm thankful cos seeing these things sort of give me a desire to work harder in school!! I desire a family!...a wife and kids! I don't know when that will happen, but i'm excited to see how God will work through everything!! Can't wait to look back and see how God writes my love story! :) I just know it's going to be so beautiful!
Jireh! :)
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
How is God's love so deep? I have no idea! I still don't understand how He can continue loving us after we have rejected Him so many times...it's ridiculous!! it truly is crazy love!...man that hurt, when you try to reach out to someone and they make it seem as if they don't care, or reject it or something...how does God bear with that every single day that I live?
Every single day, I sin, I disobey God, I reject God, I am ashamed of God, I dishonour God, I hurt God...yet everyday, He loves me infinitely! I was going to say more and more, but what more is there than infinite when His love already is infinite?!
Man, my heart is so heavy right now...I don't understand God's love for me. I don't understand other ppl sometimes... But i need to learn how to love those people with God's unfathomable love...and I really pray that the love He has poured out on me can be poured out onto others even when it's hard...The cross was no joke! It was not easy! Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might be us to God!
then i prayed
Jireh!
Every single day, I sin, I disobey God, I reject God, I am ashamed of God, I dishonour God, I hurt God...yet everyday, He loves me infinitely! I was going to say more and more, but what more is there than infinite when His love already is infinite?!
Man, my heart is so heavy right now...I don't understand God's love for me. I don't understand other ppl sometimes... But i need to learn how to love those people with God's unfathomable love...and I really pray that the love He has poured out on me can be poured out onto others even when it's hard...The cross was no joke! It was not easy! Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might be us to God!
then i prayed
Jireh!
Thursday, January 23, 2014
I think feeling hurt is okay.
Just gotta stay JoyfulJireh even when times are difficult and confusing and when life sort of throws curveballs at u yah know? haha :)
Gotta love even when it's hard! And gotta persist no matter what!
I think this is sort of what defines us as christians! taking joy in trials when all you wanna do is feel sorry for yourself. And loving when you don't think ppl deserve your love.
Thinking of Christ always humbles me and reminds me of who I need to be. Sometimes I see that gap...how far I am from being a good imitator of Him, then I remember to just press on and persevere because it is not for me, but for Him. God is sovereign and knows what's best so I must press on and live my life to bring Him glory! It's so true that we don't deserve to have God's love...but His grace is so abounding and His love never-ending. He chose me and it brings me to my knees in worship with thanksgiving. Things of this earth are so temporary...pain, money, pleasure, suffering, happiness, sadness, w/e...temporary things.
I really pray that God will use me to be a light. 1 Peter 2:12 - "Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us."
Just gotta stay JoyfulJireh even when times are difficult and confusing and when life sort of throws curveballs at u yah know? haha :)
Gotta love even when it's hard! And gotta persist no matter what!
I think this is sort of what defines us as christians! taking joy in trials when all you wanna do is feel sorry for yourself. And loving when you don't think ppl deserve your love.
Thinking of Christ always humbles me and reminds me of who I need to be. Sometimes I see that gap...how far I am from being a good imitator of Him, then I remember to just press on and persevere because it is not for me, but for Him. God is sovereign and knows what's best so I must press on and live my life to bring Him glory! It's so true that we don't deserve to have God's love...but His grace is so abounding and His love never-ending. He chose me and it brings me to my knees in worship with thanksgiving. Things of this earth are so temporary...pain, money, pleasure, suffering, happiness, sadness, w/e...temporary things.
I really pray that God will use me to be a light. 1 Peter 2:12 - "Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us."
Saturday, December 14, 2013
Chivalry LOL
LOOL alright, here is my quick rant on chivalry and girls and blah!
Okay, just wanna say that I don't enjoy it how some ppl say that chivalry is dead one day and the next day, when I'm trying to be nice to them, or chivalrous, they are like, "No! what I can do this myself" or blah blah! and like SUPER insist on it! I get it if they are just trying to be polite and stuff, but honestly, no wonder chivalry is dead/dying! the girls don't let us be chivalrous no morree!! so it's selected towards it dying! not saying that all girls do this...and not to say that all guys are nice too, but yeah!! it definitely doesn't help if I open the front door of a car for a girl and she assumes it's not for her and opens the back door for herself. OR, when I go and ring the doorbell and wait for a girl at her front door and she texts me, "be out in 5 mins, wait in the car" OR when I pick up heavy bags for a girl and the girl goes like "I want to carry those heavy bags" and actually gets angry/irritated when you insist to carry it. THen like later, there's a facebook post or something of an old couple being all cute and they are like THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER, and be like "chivalry still exists!!" as if they are mindblown.. >LOL they shouldn't be!!! if you really want chivalry to exist still, the next time a guy does something nice for you, just say, "Thanks" :)
Okay, just wanna say that I don't enjoy it how some ppl say that chivalry is dead one day and the next day, when I'm trying to be nice to them, or chivalrous, they are like, "No! what I can do this myself" or blah blah! and like SUPER insist on it! I get it if they are just trying to be polite and stuff, but honestly, no wonder chivalry is dead/dying! the girls don't let us be chivalrous no morree!! so it's selected towards it dying! not saying that all girls do this...and not to say that all guys are nice too, but yeah!! it definitely doesn't help if I open the front door of a car for a girl and she assumes it's not for her and opens the back door for herself. OR, when I go and ring the doorbell and wait for a girl at her front door and she texts me, "be out in 5 mins, wait in the car" OR when I pick up heavy bags for a girl and the girl goes like "I want to carry those heavy bags" and actually gets angry/irritated when you insist to carry it. THen like later, there's a facebook post or something of an old couple being all cute and they are like THIS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER, and be like "chivalry still exists!!" as if they are mindblown.. >LOL they shouldn't be!!! if you really want chivalry to exist still, the next time a guy does something nice for you, just say, "Thanks" :)
Monday, October 14, 2013
another u know ur fat when...
okay, so i wrote one of these like a year ogo or something buuutttt u know ur fat when even ur DAD calls you fat! LOL like usually, dad's think their sons are like super fit superstar athlete living out their athletic dreams and etc.!
Soooo like this morning I walk down shirtless after my shower and my dad is like..."so Jireh, I have a serious question for you.." and i'm like "okay?" in my mind, i was like, he's probably going to ask about school or whatever cos he always does that... LOL anyways, he goes like.. "Jireh, with all the exercise you do...how are you still so chubby?" lOLOL and i was like AHAHAH SOOO JOKKKESS!! omg i actually died! and i was like "I actually don't work out as much as people believe I do and i don't eat well so that's probably why" then I added "but yeah!! thanks! i'm trying to cut down to 185lbs" and he's like "even joshua has a much nicer body" ahaha and i'm like "okay there.. LOLOL" haha
but yeah!! legitttt!! i'm getting fat! need to cut down! and today, I was soo scared i got diabetes!! like.. i think i actually might have type 2 cos every time i workout, i feel a lot better!! like... when I don't exercise, I get really thirsty and gotta pee a lot!! and i get SUPER tired!! (like htis just happened today) BUT STILL!! huge diabetes type 2 symptoms! and i'm actually technically obese too!! sooo....... yeahhh!! i'm actually starting to get worried about it!!
btw hannah this was sort of for you! but don't feel special! :) I feel special cos ur like the only one who reads my blog! LOL :)
anyways, today I went to the gym and did smolov day 3
7x5 at 325lbs back squat!! .. lol tiring stuff!!
Jireh!
Soooo like this morning I walk down shirtless after my shower and my dad is like..."so Jireh, I have a serious question for you.." and i'm like "okay?" in my mind, i was like, he's probably going to ask about school or whatever cos he always does that... LOL anyways, he goes like.. "Jireh, with all the exercise you do...how are you still so chubby?" lOLOL and i was like AHAHAH SOOO JOKKKESS!! omg i actually died! and i was like "I actually don't work out as much as people believe I do and i don't eat well so that's probably why" then I added "but yeah!! thanks! i'm trying to cut down to 185lbs" and he's like "even joshua has a much nicer body" ahaha and i'm like "okay there.. LOLOL" haha
but yeah!! legitttt!! i'm getting fat! need to cut down! and today, I was soo scared i got diabetes!! like.. i think i actually might have type 2 cos every time i workout, i feel a lot better!! like... when I don't exercise, I get really thirsty and gotta pee a lot!! and i get SUPER tired!! (like htis just happened today) BUT STILL!! huge diabetes type 2 symptoms! and i'm actually technically obese too!! sooo....... yeahhh!! i'm actually starting to get worried about it!!
btw hannah this was sort of for you! but don't feel special! :) I feel special cos ur like the only one who reads my blog! LOL :)
anyways, today I went to the gym and did smolov day 3
7x5 at 325lbs back squat!! .. lol tiring stuff!!
Jireh!
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